HomeAbroad: Burden of expectations

HomeAbroad: Burden of expectations: Like any loyal wife, Melania Trump has come to the defense of her husband some hours to the final debate. Dismissing her husband's vulga...

Burden of expectations

Like any loyal wife, Melania Trump has come to the defense of her husband some hours to the final debate. Dismissing her husband's vulgarties on the box office video co - starring Billy Bush , as 'boys' talk, and should therefore no longer be a subject of national discourse that has the capability of tilting the election in Hilary's favor.

She has decided to accept her husband's apologies and move on, the incident happened over a decade ago anyway, and she still did not understand why the nation will not forgive and forget her boy husband youthful exuberance at age 52! Two reasons why the nation has decided to make a meal out of this one is because unlike Melania, that has the title of first Lady to gain from her magnanimity, similar expression of that virtue will not profit the nation. Such intransigence at an age that Obama has already rounded up his first term in the office is excusable, but not pardonable, especially from a heart that is not contrite.

This issue is however more moralistic than political at least to the average American and their system. They run a pro-feminine system that posits that an average woman is hampered by a male dominated environment and an egalitarian society would be the last jig saw piece in creation picture. So, the fear is that a 52 year old man who is always in the 'locker room' talking like a 'boy' may grow up to be an old man who does not know the position of his wife in his house talkless of the society.

PMB has permanently been in the news of late for the wrong reasons, but this time, for domestic reasons that should not be of our concern, if it had been kept at home. In one of his too numerous trips abroad, the President admitted to one of the most powerful women in the world during a Berlin conference that, 'I do not know the party my wife belongs to, I know she belongs to my kitchen, living room and the other room'. This sexist remark was made in apparent frustration to his wife earlier admission that she's not going to vote for his reelection if he does not shake up his indolent government. PMB ought to be aware that his popularity and goodwill have plummeted like the Naira and therefore must be at his humble best, at least for now.

This is a matrix of socio-political tendencies; firstly, a house divided against itself cannot stand, both speakers of the GOP and APC are clearly not in tandem with the Presidential nominee and the President respectively. Secondly, there are deeper cracks at home than the potential first lady and substantive first lady are admitting.

William Shakespeare once states: "hell hast no fury like a woman scorned". It may be a bit late for Trump and PMB, but there is a lesson in all these for those who believe that Eve was an afterthought of creation.

Culture Shocks

Among the plethora of culture shocks that faced us, as new emigrants - from the mild to the severe - since we got here, is the meat of this article, today.

Since both the US and Nigeria were former colonies of Uk, and therefore beneficiaries of her English language, we foresaw no communication challenges; so we thought! Unfortunately and to the dismay of Donald Trump, English language and Spanish share national prominence here, and so for us (we are left with one option). Confusingly for us however is the fact that,their version of English is spoken with so much accent and drawl, depending on which part of the Union you are.

Asking for directions or information reveals the difference in our lexicon: If you ask for toilet, the reaction is always the same. A deep furrow appears on their face in total consternation as if you are speaking an alien language. Then a wave of excitement follows as they gleefully "correct", you with, 'you meant bathroom'? What's the difference? Public facilities only have toilet provisions, while bathrooms are limited to private homes and hotel rooms. It is even more confusing when you get there and there are no bathroom facilities in such locations.

I asked my hostess for cotton bud, and was given cotton wool. In bewilderment, I explained that this will not serve purpose of cleaning my ears (which I was cleaning to enable me hear them lucidly). 'Ohh', she quipped, "you want Q-tips"? Our cotton wool is there cotton bud and our cotton bud is Q-tip. Whatever!

It is amazing how quickly kids adapt and acclimatized, while we are still grasping with the weather and laboring with everyday process, they are already coping with positive shocks of their own. The syllabus here is laser guided to chosen career and so they do not have to endure school studying eighteen subjects that are mostly not relevant to their career pursuits. Intense laboratory experiments, multiple mode of teaching (visual, interactive and computer based) and practical projects set the schedule and entire school apart from their experience here.

In Nigeria, we shared common fence with the school my kids attended,and it was typical in the morning for them (and indeed all schools), to have assembly in the morning. There, they are subjected to almost an hour of praise worship, prayers and a little sermon. I do not have issues with that, but simply feel that, that aspect of training is directly the purview of parents and schools should just concentrate on the core responsibilities of bringing our kids up academically. And America got that right first time. The indoctrination in their school is tailored towards positive attitude and self belief, contrary to our over dependence on everything and anything but ourselves.

Unlike us, they have both corporately and individually been able to conquer some issues under pride and prejudices. Before you gasp, racism to me is a function of ignorance on their part, and a ready made excuse for our inability to meet up with the rest of the world. These folks have comprehensive provisions and elaborate programs for immigrants. Large chunk of their budget is used in funding altruistic projects that benefit the rest of the world, including antagonistic nations that often treat them with contempt. While we curse our perceived enemies, they go about their business,not praying, but blessing their enemies! God BLESS America.